When people argue that online dating is a “lack of trust”, it reveals a very narrow definition of trust in God. This interpretation indicates that faith and action are mutually exclusive Online dating is not a sin. God doesn’t feel negatively about online dating. The Bible does not condemn things like online dating. God is still sovereign over your relational life no matter what Critics of online dating sites say that using them reflects a lack of faith in God. If you use an online dating site (also called online personals) to filter through a waiting pool of potential In one camp, there are some who believe looking for love online betrays a lack of faith in God's provision of a spouse. In their view, the seemingly endless lists of online profiles creates a God can work in all situations, even online dating! Meeting someone on an app does not mean God isn’t present in that process or that He won’t be present in our text conversations, our ... read more
I tried a couple different dating apps and websites, and for me, it was a great way to meet new people, create some movement in my dating life, and learn a lot about myself and what I was looking for in a potential spouse. It also helped me work through some of the anxiety and fear I had around dating and gave me more confidence in my ability to communicate.
I met a couple of guys I connected with and went on a few good dates, but none of them turned into a long-term relationship. Eventually, I noticed a shift in the way I was using the app. I was depending on it and the number of dates I was going on more than I was on God, and I was getting exhausted.
I ended up deleting my profile and taking a break for a while. I did have an overall positive experience with online dating, however, and I wouldn't be opposed to using it again in the future. When we don't know when to do what, it's an opportunity to draw near to Him and ask. He knows if you need to take a risk or take a break. He knows what to do with all the feelings and difficulties that can go along with dating or not dating, and He cares about your life and your future. In fact, He has really great things planned for you.
Trust Him to lead you in the right direction, and eventually in His timing, to the right person. Andrea is a graduate of the school of ministry at Bethel and serves on the writing team for Moral Revolution. She is passionate about seeing the church carry joyful hope and expectation in every area of their lives. She longs to see the upcoming generation equipped as strong leaders who steward their lives well and influence society as a result.
Topics Blog Events Video Series Store Donate Resources About. Back Upcoming Events Invite Us. Back Impact Partners We Give 3 Donate. Back Books Online Courses Coaching Videos Podcasts Recommended Resources. Back Meet The Team Who We Are Contact. Likewise, randomly throwing your profile online for the whole world to see is probably not going to be an effective way of finding a godly spouse with a desire to glorify God.
So in that sense, God really does care how you go about trying to meet people. But as long as you are relying on biblical wisdom, listening to the counsel of your Christian community, and truly trying to honor God, there is nothing inherently sinful about online dating.
Again, what God really cares about is who you marry, not how you meet this person. God commands Christians to marry other Christians 1 Corinthians , 2 Corinthians As long as this is your goal, there is nothing wrong with using online dating. Listen to what John Piper has to say about online dating by clicking here. While online dating is not a sin, there are many dangers to online dating for Christian singles. Social media is so tempting to misuse because it is so easy to portray ourselves however we want.
We can take the perfect picture, phrase our sentences just right, and reveal only the most flattering information about ourselves. So if you decide to give online dating a chance, you have to know yourself. Are you easily wowed and gullible? Do you really think everyone online is there with good intentions?
If you know you have a history of picking guys who are handsome over honoring, rich over respectful, or charismatic over Christ-centered, then you need to be very careful online dating. If you are a guy who instantly maxes out the credit cards when a pretty girl gives you attention, again, you need to be extra cautious when mingling online. Be honest. If you lack discretion, if you are not known for your discernment, or if you are easily wowed by surface information, then online dating might not be for you.
If nothing else, at least ask a friend to keep you accountable as you search for a godly spouse online. Online dating is a pretty bold move. You are making a serious step forward in being very active and not passive in your hopes to find a spouse. The danger here is that once you start pressing forward, you might press forward too hard and compromise since you want to find a Christian spouse so bad.
This is where Christian accountability will really benefit you. But make sure you include other Christians in this process who you respect. Bounce ideas off of them.
Let them do some searching too on your behalf. Also, this is just a good safety tip. If the person you are dating is solid, he or she will respect your concern for safety and appreciate the effort you are putting in to find a solid spouse. At minimum, tell other people who you are going to meet and where you are meeting them. Dating is an emotional rollercoaster.
I know that is impossible to do perfectly. And quite frankly, this is a serious thing. Trying to find the person you are going to spend the rest of your life with is no small matter. With all that said, you are going to wear yourself out if you take each date too seriously. Just go on a date and enjoy it for what it is. a date. Will you probably jump way ahead in your mind, imagining if this person will make a good dad to your 3 children named Heather, Austin, and Frank?
But then come back to reality and live with realistic expectations. You are probably not going to meet your future husband or wife on the first date or two you go on when you begin online dating. Try to enjoy each date for what it is. I believe the intention behind dating should be to find a spouse.
Having said that, there are still beneficial parts to dating even if that specific relationship does not result in marriage. But also know you are probably not going to marry the first, second, or third person you date. Dating people enhances your character. It increases your discernment. It refines what qualities you really care about in another person.
Dating people will force you to realize things about yourself you would otherwise never have learned. It can prepare you to become the person you need to be to thrive when you finally do meet your future spouse.
Online dating is one of those subjects that Christians enjoy debating. In one camp, there are some who believe looking for love online betrays a lack of faith in God's provision of a spouse. In their view, the seemingly endless lists of online profiles creates a superficial consumer mentality that undermines the sacrificial nature of Christ-centered love. The other side counters that online dating is merely a tool God can use to bring two people together — users don't place their faith in the matchmaking site, but in the Lord.
What can be wrong with that? The arguments on both sides have merit. Like many things, online dating isn't inherently evil or good. Sometimes things are less about what we do than about the heart we do it with.
More often than not, the Bible offers general principles over specifics. We can then take these big ideas and apply them to our everyday lives and the choices we make. But that process requires wisdom, discernment and guidance. Focus' online community for young adults, Boundless , seeks to help singles navigate these issues. Through Boundless, Focus encourages intentional living and offers resources that motivate young adults to know their worth in Christ as individuals and to be open to the opportunities God may have for them.
For some in the Boundless community, this may lead them to trust God to bring a spouse through church, work, or a blind date set up through mutual friends.
For others, it may involve signing up to an online dating site and seeing if God uses that. Boundless has even joined forces with online dating service ChristianCafe. com to help connect marriage-minded Christian singles and provide them with Bible-based relationship advice. What if a single man or woman signs up to ChristianCafe. com and meets someone? Where do they go from there? You can't stay online forever, so how does a potential couple make the jump from the virtual world to the "real world"?
To help answer this question, I'm going to share some tips from one of my female colleagues. She met her husband online and has good insight on making the transition from being matched in a dating service to meeting in-person.
You can read their complete story in this Boundless post. Quickly bring this person into your community and get to know theirs.
This gives you much-needed context to making sure this person is who they say they are. In the end, meeting online is something we don't even think about now. God used online dating to get us together, but, like couples who meet in a more conventional manner, we had to pray, trust and obey throughout every step of the dating and engagement journey.
We've now been married for four-and-a-half years and we have two precious kids. There's no doubt in our minds that God, not our dating site, was our ultimate matchmaker. If you or someone you know is interested in trying out ChristianCafe. com, you can take advantage of a special offer through Boundless by using this link. Before you do, consider reading through Boundless' article on the 10 online dating "don'ts" for men and women.
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CP Opinion Saturday, June 01, But then what? Meet in-person as soon as you can. Think of online dating as merely a tool to meet new people. My husband and I know of various other Christian couples who met online and are now married.
Common to all of us was that we transitioned from the online world to the "real world" as soon as we could. There's a temptation when meeting online to keeping it there because it's so "safe. That's why meeting in person sooner rather than later is wise. It gives you a chance to get to know the person in the real world. Scheduling the in-person meeting before you develop serious feelings can help you make wise decisions on whether this is a relationship you want to continue exploring or not.
Common sense is as important online as it is in the "real world. Meeting on a Christian dating site doesn't automatically mean the person you're communicating with is who they say they are. When you schedule that first in-person meeting, do it in a public area. When my husband and I first met in person, I had someone I trusted an older male come with me and help me make sure this "virtual guy" was legit. I also made sure he met some of my trusted friends early on so they could give me input.
That he was willing to be vetted helped me realize his intentions were sincere and his heart humble. That he quickly made sure I met his friends and family helped me know his intentions were serious. It's OK if the initial meeting is a bit awkward at first. I'm not going to lie — I felt a bit self-conscious and shy that first day I hung out with The Man Who Would Become My Husband. It was strange to me that this guy knew how my day at work yesterday had gone, and yet I didn't know if his eyes crinkled up when he smiled or if he gestured a lot when he talked.
In case you're wondering, by the way, they do and he does. He was patient for me to come out of my shell a bit, and thank God I was able to overcome any foolish notions I had that our meeting would be perfect out of the box. We learned that it's worth working for things that matter. In all things, trust God and follow His lead. But let me hear from you. Have you ever tried online dating? How did it go? I'd love to hear your story. Jim Daly is president of Focus on the Family and host of its National Radio Hall of Fame-honored daily broadcast, heard by more than 2.
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Online dating is not a sin. God doesn’t feel negatively about online dating. The Bible does not condemn things like online dating. God is still sovereign over your relational life no matter what God can work in all situations, even online dating! Meeting someone on an app does not mean God isn’t present in that process or that He won’t be present in our text conversations, our When people argue that online dating is a “lack of trust”, it reveals a very narrow definition of trust in God. This interpretation indicates that faith and action are mutually exclusive Critics of online dating sites say that using them reflects a lack of faith in God. If you use an online dating site (also called online personals) to filter through a waiting pool of potential Does dating online mean I’m not “trusting God”? How do you navigate online dating? Because it’s not specifically mentioned in the Bible, online dating, much like in-person dating, is Because she trusted God to unite her with her future husband, she decided not to use online dating sites or go to Christian singles groups in order to meet eligible bachelors. She ... read more
I believe the intention behind dating should be to find a spouse. The bottom line is that in 1 Corinthians 7 we see the biblical teaching that God gives us freedom to choose if we marry and, thus, whom we marry. When my husband and I first met in person, I had someone I trusted an older male come with me and help me make sure this "virtual guy" was legit. But if I had to put a number on it, I personally think a healthy dating season is around a year or two. On the other hand, sites like this may be perfect for introverts who do not get out much and may have trouble meeting people of the opposite sex. Andrea is a graduate of the school of ministry at Bethel and serves on the writing team for Moral Revolution. Topics Blog Events Video Series Store Donate Resources About.The surprising key to real social change. I get mixed messages about this all the time. I actually talk a lot about this in my new course, Double Your Dating Prospects. Continue Shopping. and failed to attract those i liked.